I keep saying I’m going to get into blogging more often, but I never get round to it – never enough hours in the day – maybe it’s because I’m actually always sharing my thoughts etc through mirco-blogging on twitter and facebook.
Every so often though something happens that I want to vent about and share my thoughts with about….and this time it’s – Jiah Khan, bless her soul.
I’ve just got back from a glorious relaxing break in Egypt. Just what I needed before I have some personal health issues to deal with, but whilst I was away I couldn’t get the story of Jiah Khan out of my head – breaks my heart to think that someone can feel so low and alone that they felt there’s no solution to their problems other than dying.
I met Jiah a few years back just after ‘Nishabd’, it was very brief but at the time I remember thinking, ‘Wow this girl is going to be huge in Bollywood and she has everything going for her’. I also felt extremely proud that she was from London and flying the flag for us in Bollywood. Never did I think then this would be this budding actress’ fate.
Just before I went away I heard the news of Jiah Khan, and whilst on holiday I read her heart-breaking suicide note. I also read the comments that many people, including Bollywood celebrities themselves were making about her taking her own life…reading some of those comments made my blood boil. How can people be so judgemental?
For someone to take their own life so drastically can only mean one thing – that they’ve hit rock bottom and see no other way out of what’s going on in their head – so who are we to judge her for taking her own life?
Many Bollywood celebs and experts have come out and said this is what Bollywood can do to some people and that is true in some cases, but even after her suicide note which doesn’t actually blame her career they are still stating that she gave up her own life because of her ‘failing career’ – have these people totally ignored that fact that Jiah has aimed most of her suicide note at a man (supposedly Suraj Pancholi), and talked of issues such as rape & having to have had to abort her baby.
Many have jumped on the band wagon and voiced the opinion of actress Riya Sen who has shockingly called Jiah a ‘coward’.
She said, “Suicide is a cowardly act” – well my message to Riya is ‘Not it’s not!!!’ Suicide is not a cowardly act; a cowardly act is ridiculing someone’s pain and not having any sentiment for feeling their desperation. Suicide goes far & beyond that!
Apparently reports claim that Riya had a ‘thing’ for Suraj Pancholi and back in 2010 got very drunk and forced herself on him, and was then seen in a passionate kiss with him…not blaming just her mind – as a passionate kiss takes two! However, this says a lot – maybe Riya’s opinions are more biased because of her own personal feelings and involvement. Whatever they may be, I think anyone who thinks in this way has no right to be so judgemental. I really do hope the media reports that have quoted Riya are not as true as they make out!
Yes, Jiah’s career was probably failing and not going as great as she had initially hoped for, but what Jiah was going through personally goes much deeper than anyone of us could have known.
For someone to say these words, “All I want now is to go to sleep and never wake up again. I am nothing. I had everything. I felt so alone even while with you. You made me feel alone and vulnerable. I am so much more than this.”
Just reading those final few words, pulls at my heart. She says at the very end “I am so much more than this.” – She knows she deserved better, she knows she was better but yet still saw no way out.
No one knows the truth of what happened between her and Suraj Pancholi but them, but if he is behind the cause of her taking her own life then I really do hope that he pays. What some men…and I mean some, not all men, fail to realise is that whilst they enjoy to play games of manipulation and power they’re actions have consequences on some women, and can sometimes bring a woman to her very lowest point.
I have been through times in my life when I’ve felt at my lowest believe me, many years ago mind. Now I am much stronger, but those were times when I wanted to give up on everyone and everything, but I had a great family, and such good friends who got me through those rough times – my heart goes out to Jiah because she must have felt so alone. Only if you are in that situation when you feel so alone, even though there are crowds of people around you will you be able to comprehend Jiah’s turmoil.
So who are we to judge? Who are we to make comments on a girl who had everything going for her yet felt like she had nothing?
What should this story teach us? It teaches us that the world can be a cruel place. It teaches us that life can sometimes become so much for people that they feel they have no other choice. It teaches us that sometimes those we depend on the most & love sometimes let us down.
The sad thing is just lately I have heard a lot of cases where young Asian people have taken their own lives because of depression. It makes me wonder what is going on in our society. Do we not see depression as a serious issue? Why is it that such issue’s within our society still remain to be ignored and cultural ignorance seems to get the better of us?!
This is where you and I come into it. Take time out for those who need you. Take time out to get to know those around you better and listen to a person’s cry for help, be there for them. Notice when a person changes and don’t be so self-involved that you don’t realise that a person who may be acting irrationally may actually be crying out for help.
I’m not saying we can all be saviours and rescue the world; all I’m saying is take time out for others and if you care for someone – tell them. If you love someone – tell them. If you want to show someone how much you care – show them. Life is too short to dwell, and life is too precious for us to feel so low that we take drastic steps.
My heart goes out to Jiah and all her close ones, and many people like her who have felt so depressed that even being alive is too much for them.
Love those around you, let them know you love them, and let them show you they love you….
Life is just too short,